Jake Newbury
Head of Gryffindor
Posts : 1248
Birthday : 1992-08-13
Join date : 2014-11-29
Location : London, England
Job/hobbies : Auror & DADA Professor
 | | Subject: Re: Jake's NaNoWriMo -- 2023 Tue Nov 28, 2023 8:56 pm | |
| 21 – The Truth The New Year had come in with his parents, Mari had gone somewhat radio silent on him after their call on Christmas Day, and Jake had been much too aware of pushing the situation with the witch when that was not what she wanted. He had, of course, sent her a wish for a good year ahead, but nothing more. She had returned the message, mostly out of politeness, Jake had assumed, because there had been nothing more in it.
January had been packed with the Auror training for both, neither gaining any free time. The texts had warmed back up with the days that passed, and Jake had been all too welcoming of the pictures that kept him picturing the witch with him, and not across the pond. It, of course, was not the same as having Mari beside him, but Jake would take what he could get.
February was much the same, neither one getting enough time off to get to the other’s country, until the last weekend. Mari had been stood waiting by the barracks when he had returned from his day’s training, and Jake could not help but feel the swell of excitement that made itself known in his chest as he hurried over to the witch and drew her in to his arms. Drawing in her soft scent, and holding her tighter than was necessary.
“What are you doing here?” Jake asked, the smile on his features showing that he was quite pleased with the surprise, and not at all wanting this to change.
“Do I have to spell that out for you, dummy?” She returned in her usually brash manner that he had come to enjoy over the months.
“Wouldn’t hurt.” Jake countered cheekily, earning a well-deserved swat to his chest for the effort.
“Are you done for the day?” Mari asked, clearly not wanting to say the words aloud that Jake had been vying for in that moment.
“Mmhmm.” Jake replied.
“Let’s get out of here, then.” Mari had insisted, and Jake did not need to be told twice. Breaking from their embrace for long enough only to go and grab his wallet from his wardrobe, Jake had returned to the front of the barracks and Mari not even two minutes later. She had apparated them out of the camp, landing in what must have been her hotel room.
From there, the usual routine had ensued.
Clothes had been taken away only to the extent needed. Mari’s legs had been wrapped around Jake’s waist, and he had been inside of her before either one of them could suggest anything else.
But it was different.
The urgency of it all had not been there this time.
The touch of Mari’s hands had been softer, exploratory rather than entirely too functional. Their kisses did not bring forth the sparring match that they usually insisted upon… No, everything had the edge taken off it this time, and with that knowledge, Jake had opted to retreat to the bed rather than firmly pressing Mari’s back in to the wall, or resting her on the edge of a table or cabinet. The strokes along his member were much more measured this time, and as the kisses slowly subsided, their eyes met.
And it was different.
Mari’s fingers had looped in to the collar of his shirt, and her eyes, they told him not to go away. Their ferocity of times before was instead coloured with the silent question of not hurting her, of keeping her safe.
Jake had nodded slowly with the understanding; he knew those eyes all too well.
***
They had led, spent, on the bed for what must have been an hour by now. Jake could not have been sure of that timing, but he knew it had felt like a long while. Neither one of them had said anything, but the shift in everything they had ever said, done, or been to one another was palpable in that moment. Why, today of all days, it had changed, Jake could not have put his finger on.
He just knew that he had not had that powerful a kind of sex in a long time.
If ever.
Which was precisely why he was far too scared to make the first move. Far too scared to say the first words after.
Just scared.
Mari had curled in to his side post release, her head tucked upon his chest in a manner that was unfamiliar with her. His left arm was encircled around her waist, gentle in its hold upon her skin, but resolutely there and unmoving at the same time. He could feel her breathing against his partly open shirt, sometimes it had remained even, and some times it had grown quite shallow. Jake had made it his focal point in that moment, not knowing what else to do.
“Did you really not sleep with anyone else, this entire time?”
The words were spoken so softly, and in a manner so unrelatable to Mari, Jake had had to do a double take in his own head that she had really asked the question of him.
“No,” Jake replied softly, still not moving a muscle as she nodded against his chest. “I can’t say I had the inclination. Or… time.” That much was quite true, Auror training, Mari, and his family, it had all kept him far too busy to even contemplate wanting to find someone else to screw around with.
Mari stayed quiet, contemplating something Jake assumed.
“It’s okay, that you did.” Jake added, trying to alleviate what he could only guess to be guilt from her mind. Mari did not think it worth commenting on. Instead, her hand threaded in to his shirt, creasing the material between her fingers this way and that.
Jake’s right hand moved up to meet the hand that was fidgeting, carefully putting his over hers to stop the worrying that she was exhibiting. Trying to comfort her so that she would not feel anxious for the reason Jake could not fathom in that moment. The British witch’s hand went still beneath his, but he could feel her foot begin to move softly back and forth in its place, clearly showing that she was going to fuss until they had managed to get through the conversation she was battling through.
“It’s alright, take your time.” Jake encouraged Mari gently, and for a moment, her body was still. Only a moment, though, because her foot started up again once more.
“I’ve… never been in a serious relationship.” Mari said, only to the button on his shirt, not to him. Jake caught the words, though, and he understood. He kept quiet, Mari was building up to something, and it would take all her strength to get through it.
“Not because of a bad relationship.” She clarified, clearly that notion was one that Mari considered to be a weakness in other people, because she did not wish to be tarnished with that brush herself. Jake nodded, despite her eyes not being upon him, but she would feel the soft movement from her position beside him.
“When I was sixteen, my school, Hogwarts, was attacked.” Mari explained, her body was tense beside him, but her voice was that of someone who had learned to tell the story and not show any emotion whilst doing so. It was an almost factual recount, rather than a lived experience. “A rogue group, that was caught up in quite a lot of stuff in Europe at that time, you might have heard of them, the leader was Nathaniel- “
“Brookshire.” Jake finished, the name all too familiar of the man who had brought forth far too much pain at Lugarmago and Hogwarts.
Mari’s head lifted from his chest almost too quickly as she looked up to try to work out how he could possibly know that.
“I used to volunteer there…” Jake replied, it did not seem to help Mari in that moment, but he did not elaborate, this was her story, not his own.
“Well… one of Brookshire’s men…” Mari started, wavering because she had been interrupted. Her eyes retreated down to his chest, unable to keep eye contact in that moment. “They broke in to Hogwarts when we were hosting the Quidditch Match between Salem and Hogwarts. They were intent on burning Hogwarts to the ground, like they had with Lugarmago – that was my first school. I had been heading off from the pitch, the Quidditch game hadn’t been one that I found particularly exciting…
“They had entered the school, the handful of men that followed Brookshire. One of them had seen me wandering away from the Quidditch Pitch on my own, an easy target. The man had taken me from the school, forgetting the rest of the mission he was supposed to be undertaking in that moment. He had seen me as a greater prize than anything that Brookshire could have offered him, so he had kidnapped me.”
Jake already knew what Mari was going to say.
“He had kept me his captive. He had repeatedly raped me.”
And yet he still cringed as she explained her story.
“For weeks. Until… until the British Auror team managed to find me.” Mari’s voice shook a little, the emotion managing to break through the walls even though she had tried so very, very hard to keep it within. Jake did not speak once again, knowing better than to butt in for a second time, knowing better than to move to comfort the witch because it would only make her feel worse if he did.
“I have never wanted that time to define me, and yet… that time has made it ridiculously hard for me to let people in. It’s made it almost impossible to trust anyone – especially men – after the way I was treated during that time. I was kept like an animal, rather than a human being. At the time, I’d just wanted to…” Mari could not finish the sentence.
“I wanted to reclaim my identity from there. Not be the girl who was taken, not to be the girl that everyone pitied because she must have gone through hell and back. I wanted to be Mari Caldwell, the woman who could do anything she put her mind to. The woman who could kick any man’s ass who stood before her, no matter how good he might be at fighting. I wanted to be the woman who could have sex with anyone, and it wouldn’t have to mean anything. I wanted to have sex and be treated like I was a commodity worth having, rather than remembering how he had made me feel like I was nothing more than somewhere to put his dick.” Mari was clearly trying to get it all off her chest, and Jake slowly nodded, so as not to deter her from doing so.
“I… well, I don’t understand, but I am listening.” Jake told her softly. The man knew better than to pretend he could ever understand the plight she had been through at that time, but he wanted her to know that he was taking it in, and that he was listening.
“That’s why I was so happy when you said we could do this all casually and you wouldn’t care.” Mari continued. “If we never went past the point of being casual, I wouldn’t ever have to tell you anything, you would move on to the next girl, I could move on to someone else, and the wheel would keep going round in the same motion.
“But, the trouble with these best laid plans? They never work.”
Jake let out a soft laugh at that statement. Only a short one, because it was not the time for laughter, but it was to show that he appreciated the attempt at lightening the mood, even if it would only last a second.
Mari’s head moved from the man’s chest in that moment, her eyes searching for his, and then within them. Jake did not know what she was looking for, but after a moment, whatever it was she had been after, she seemed to find.
“What is it, that you want in life?” The British witch asked, her fingers curling around his with a grip that was far too strong in that moment. Fear had coursed through her body, Jake could sense that, but he was not attuned to why.
“Right now?” Jake asked, Mari nodded. “Well, I guess, right now, I want to finish my Auror training, and feel like I have achieved something in my life.” The answer was honest, but he could see that that was not nearly far enough for Mari to be happy with him.
“From there, I want to get in to the Ministry, to start work and feel useful again.” Jake continued, watching Mari’s features hang on each word he spoke. “Then, I guess, I want to consider a wider picture. A family – I’ve always wanted a family. A wife, two kids, maybe three. With a nice house somewhere…”
Mari seemed to be considering the last two sentences more carefully than anything else he had said before. Jake had waited to see what she would say, not wanting to push too hard too quickly, to give her time to digest.
The witch did not seem to be able to ask her next question, though. Her lips had moved softly to try to form a sentence, but that sentence was not compliant to her wishes. The eyes had found his again, their manner quite as scared as they had been before, but hoping that Jake would be able to fill in the gaps that her lips refused to accommodate.
“I don’t know if that would be something… that you might want. But if it were…”
Jake left it unsaid that he would be willing to do those things with Mari if that was what she wanted of him. He could see the fear of suggesting anything permanent was making her jittery, and Merlin knew he was well versed in going in to a commitment without solid plans before him.
“All of it is negotiable, though.” Jake finally added, and he could see the weight lifting from Mari’s shoulders in that moment. It was quite clear that the idea of full commitment would be one that she would have to be eased in to, rather than rushing in to, and Jake completely understood. This was the first time they had spoken about the future, and though the future was a highly uncertain thing, he wanted her to know that he would not hold her to anything she did not want to.
Mari’s hand moved to her jean’s pocket, and from within she produced a small, silver key.
“I want you to have this.” She managed, simple enough as she held it between them.
Jake had eyed the key for a moment, before his hand moved up to meet Mari’s and took the key from her grasp.
“What is it?” He asked.
“A key.” Mari returned; the cheekiness apparent once again in her features.
“I meant what is it for?” Jake replied, rolling his eyes playfully at the witch for her retort.
“Exactly what you think it is for.”
Jake had looked back to the key in his hand, the word YALE was printed in the silver quite clearly. He did not know the brand of the key, but he was quite sure this would be to the witch’s flat. A flat that was almost like Guantanamo to get in to.
Jake leant forward in that moment, pressing a kiss to the witch’s lips to show that he appreciated the sentiment of the key. That he would keep it safe. That he would keep her safe as they pushed forward in to this uncharted territory that they found themselves heading towards, because even if it was not today or tomorrow, they were moving in towards a future that would no longer be on their own.
It would be a future together.
Whatever that turned out to be.________________________________________________~ Auror ~ Profile ~ DADA Professor ~ ~ In a Relationship ~ 36 ~ Father ~ 6' ~ American Accent ~  | |
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