The Warmth of Beethoven (Ethan)

The pressure to be perfect could be explained as crippling. It created a huge burden that hung on from Layla's shoulders causing her to hunch a bit more when she walked. The once confident thirteen year old was now a less confident thirteen year old. The physical light in her eyes had burned out and for a moment, she looked like a completely different person. The girls long hair was tied up in a messy bun and for once, she looked uncaring. She wasn't dressed nicely and she simply was not very presentable.

Layla's feet were heavy as she walked to the one room ever able to provide solace. The fact that it was rarely use was a thought that made her feel good. As she pushed open the door and flicked on the light, the girl took her place before the black, rather grand, grand piano. Her fingers brushed the ivory as her heart sped up.

The past summer, she had spent a lot of her off time in piano lessons, learning to play the beautiful instrument. The brushing of her fingers turned into her fingers lightly pressing the keys which eventually turned into her fingers banging the keys. Beethoven filled the room and probably even the corridor that held the music room, and frankly, she could care less.

Layla could literally feel the music wrapping around her sort of like a security blanket as she played. Tears flowed from her eyes as the tune changed to one of her own songs and she began to song. The words were harsh, words she'd never heard before, but she liked it. Harsher and harsher. Faster and Faster. The music carried about, bouncing off the walls as her voice grew into a forte.

As the music began to slow, so did the girl's voice and eventually, she found herself singing quietly as she shook from adrenaline. Tears still flowed freely and the warmth that she had once felt was now gone, leaving her cold.

Ethan hadn't been to any of his classes so far, and he wasn't looking forward to starting his last year at Hogwarts. He glanced back down at his robes he was wearing and loosened his tie. There was a tiny little badge he had gotten along with his letter. A prefect's badge. Ethan had no intention of becoming a Prefect, but it was what the Headmaster wanted then by all means he would full fill his duties so he wouldn't look bad if he was removed from the prefects. Although he did have to say that the bathrooms were very nice.

The Gryffindor's summer hadn't been anything but boring until the very end when he went to Layla's performance. His parents had set him up on several "dates" to try and see who he would marry off to continue the Girth line. He didn't plan on doing anything of the sorts, unless he had a good feeling about one of them. They were all stuck up and snobby though and he wanted someone he could laugh and cut up with.

As he was walking down the corridor to god only knows where he was passing the music and dance room when he heard a piano playing. He stopped to listen for a while it got louder and faster. The song changed into one that sounded very familiar. He stuck his head in the door and watched the girl play and sing. She was slowing down and growing softer. He stepped in and realized who it was at once, but she didn't look quite like herself. "Layla?" He called out. He wasn't sure if she just wanted to be alone. Moving so he could see her face, he frowned in concern. Why was she crying?

"What's wrong?" he asked confusedly. He didn't like it when people cried, much less when they were one of his best friends. He sat down next to her and wrapped his arms around her in an attempt to comfort her.

The sound of the door caused Layla to jump as she hit a wrong key, completely throwing off the piece and causing more distress. Layla could feel the wetness on her face just as she could practically taste the saltiness that came from her tears. She didn't need to turn her head to guess who it was. The voice told her all she needed to know. Ethan.

His voice was hard to describe. It was one that when used, everyone just sort of stopped to listen. It was warm and flowing like hot chocolate and it radiated a feeling of comfort. The sound almost caused her to melt, however, when his arms went around her, she actually did melt.

Being in Ethan's arms was the most relaxing feeling ever and his touched instantly caused her body to relax. She wanted nothing but to stay like that for all of eternity, she wanted him to hold her tighter, tell her it would all be okay and just stay, but she knew he couldn't. Ethan wasn't hers and never would be. He was older, therefore he would most likely prefer an older girl and he was a pureblood. It was necessary for him to keep his family pure, it was necessary for him to be with someone his parents would approve of, not his best friend, not some third year and not some wannabe celebrity. He, like everyone else, would eventually leave, not necessarily because he wanted to, but because that was how the world worked and that was how the wizarding world worked. He was graduating and she'd probably never see him again. Though, it couldn't stop her from enjoying the now, right?

She didn't know how to start. There was so much that was wrong, her life, the crush she had on him, the lack of perfectionism she portrayed, the lack of fans she'd accumulated, the stress, all of it.

"I just can't take it!" Layla choked out a sob, feeling like a little kid in the seventeen year old boys arms. "The pressure of being perfect, the stress, the lack of support, the lack of people around here who don't know who I am," she paused, "all of this work for a world tour and no one knows who I am." The last part came out a bit more mumbled as she put her hands over her face. Her first thought had been the fact that she didn't want him to see her like this, however, that was instantly pushed aside as his embrace came into play.

"Plus I -" she stopped, suddenly realising that she should not tell him that she liked him. It had taken her a while to come out of the denial of crushing on a boy, but when she had, the emotions hit her hard. She knew there were no chances but she still wanted to let him know anyways, however, she was scared. What if he distanced himself and refused to be her friend?

Ethan was completely thrown off by her, and he had no idea why. Normally he would have just left them as soon as he saw the tears, but He felt the need to comfort her in that moment. He rubbed in between her shoulders in a comforting way. He didn't want to try anything of the sorts with Layla, or any person to be honest, as he wasn't that way.

His frown deepened when she spoke. It sounded like she was breaking down on the inside. He hugged her a little tighter in an attempt to make her feel safer. "Hey, its okay." he spoke gently. Ethan was about to ask what she couldn't take, but his answer was soon found as she started to spill everything to the older boy. He guessed it was a little more stressful than he thought because of the way she was going. Who was he to know, he wasn't a celebrity that just went world wide.

He had the strong urge to tell her that he was right there, and that the other people could forget about it. "Don't worry about being perfect, that's impossible. Even for me, unfortunately. I support you 100% of the way, and I know you do amazing. You had everyone cheering for an encore on your last performance!" He stated. His tone was still gentle and reassuring hoping that she would cheer up.

"Everyone in the Muggle world knows your name. Wizards don't tend to keep up with them. I'm sure there are some people who would die just to shake your hand." He chuckled. "It wasn't for nothing."

Ethan paused as she started again, waiting patiently. He was confused when she didn't continue and simply waited for her to either continue or not tell him. He wasn't going to push her say anything she didn't want, but his curiosity was eating him up on the inside.

Untouched snow, having someone play with her hair, rain, a fuzzy blanket on a cold day, walking barefoot on fresh cut grass, the scent of a loved one, long, heartfelt hugs, waves crashing against the shore, the scent of flowers wafting through the air and the soft purr of a happy cat; these are all things that comforted Layla the most. However, now she found something or someone that comforted her even more than any of those things. Ethan. The sound of his voice, the silky, smoothness that coiled from his lips no louder than a mere whisper meant for her, was comforting just as the warmth from his arms and his scent that filled her nostrils every time he hugged her and she buried her face into him. It was the little things that mattered.

She couldn't see the frown on his face as she refused to look up at him. She refused to allow him to see the full horror that was probably etched all over her. She must look absolutely disastrous. His words, they were ever so gentle, ever so mesmerizing and as he hugged her tighter, she sunk deeper into his arms. He was the potter, he was the clay, he could mold her however he wanted. He said it would be okay, and she knew it would be okay, however, at this particular moment in time, things didn't seem so.

She nodded. She knew being perfect was impossible, she wasn't born to be perfect, she was born to be real, but there was something about the fame life that caused her to push towards perfection or at least as close as she could get to it. It was a shock to hear him say that he supported her. "That's so kind of you," she sniffled out, hating the fact that she'd been crying. She loved him for being supportive because that, was exactly what she needed. Support. She didn't know how she could possibly love Ethan, but in that moment, she decided she did. However, it was not a love that a lover had, it was a love that a sister had or a daughter had. It was unconditional. He was also right about the fact that everyone was cheering her on for an encore, maybe she was more loved than she thought. Maybe she was famous and she just didn't realise.

Growing up as a Muggleborn was something that caused Layla to see the Wizarding world differently. She didn't realise that Wizards didn't really listen to music until he told her, she never realised that she would never, no matter how hard she tried, be famous in this world. For once, within the past month, she was willing to accept that. Her crying became almost nonexistent except for a few sniffles here and there and the occasional tear or two. She smiled at the thought of people dying to shake her hand. "Like who?" Her head was still turned down so her eyes stared at the floor.

Finally, the girl's crying had completely stopped and she looked up to him, her eyes connecting with his as the last bit of her tears sat on her cheeks, creating a slight glisten from the moisture. However, when she looked up, something gold caught her eye and she adverted her eyes to his chest to find out what the gleaming golden object was. A Prefect's badge. He really was a Prefect! Layla smiled, feeling very excited for him as her fingers reached up to touch it. The ran over the cool metal feeling along every bump and curve and indention. "Ethan," the girl said, her voice only a mere whisper as if the words were only his to hear, "do you think I'll ever own one of these?" She was so innocent as she looked into his eyes, waiting for his answer.

In that moment, she wished she was older, or closer to his age at least and nowhere near as innocent because she would kiss him.

Ethan had always found a way to make anything better, sometimes by hugs. Other times by hexing people. Whatever the situation called for, he was there to stop it. When Kyle was only five, another had called him a name in Diagon Alley. Ethan didn't have his wand yet. He walked up to the other child that had made the rude remark, and before his father had been able to stop him, he had punched him square in the nose, feeling like the situation had been taken care of. He had left that day in a good mood, his parents however, in a sour one as they couldn't get him to apologize. Today he had stumbled upon Layla in the music room and was solving the situation with a hug and comforting words.

When Layla was crying, he felt like he or someone else had done something to upset the thirteen year old. Almost like him breaking his broomstick, or getting knocked out by a well aimed bludger. He felt terrible and he had to correct the situation right then and there. He had to drop everything and skip a class or two to make sure she was okay. To make sure that whatever had happened, didn't happen again.

He felt himself relax as she was beginning to calm down. He didn't realize he was that tense. He guessed he was afraid of making her more upset by his words. Ethan only smiled at her response. He was nothing but kind to Layla. Its what best friends were for, right? HE had supported her, he had come to her concert and everything. Cheering along with some strange group of people he didn't know because that's what supporting someone meant. He would continue to support her no matter what, whether or not his parents or other friends liked it.

Ethan just merely chuckled at her question. There were several people he knew. "Well, there was this group of teenage girls that would absolutely love to at least say hi, even more so to shake your hand by the sound of the screams and constant chant of an encore. And that's only a small number of people who were there." He laughed.

His smile remained when her crying had stopped completely. He had done what he was supposed to do. Waiting patiently for her to face him as she moved on the piano bench, he looked down to where he eyes stopped. "of course I think you'll get one. What doesn't make you seem like you won't get one?" He practically scoffed. She was smart, kind, responsible, and a really good Keeper. Who wasn't to say she would get one?

Taking his hands out from around her, he wiped away the tear stains from her cheeks. He really didn't think about what he was doing as he did it, he just kind of did. "There." He whispered. There was no real reason to do so, it just kind of happened that way. Ethan just smiled down at her tracing his badge. Instinctively he brushed back a few stand hairs from her face as she did so, just sitting in a comfortable silence with her.

Usually, the roles were switched and Layla was the one doing the comforting like that time her best friends parents got divorced. Layla was the one who stayed with her every night that summer, giving up nights of sleeping to have sleepovers and listen to her cry and figure out ways to take her mind off of it. When her cousin broke his arm while they were hiking, Layla was the one who helped him stabilize it through his tears until she could help him back home. It had always been Layla as the comforter and never the comfortee. She never needed it, but it she would have, who would have been there for her? However, now, that question had an answer. Ethan. Ethan would have been there for her because he was there now being her comfort and the girl had no clue how to thank him.

"Really?" she asked, a look of disbelief on her face. The fact that everyone from London wanted an encore at her show was something that still had Layla in a state of shock. She wondered if when she visited Muggle London this summer whether or not teenage girls and boys would run up to her in hopes of retrieving her autograph. The thought brought a slight smile to her face and then she remembered, she had no clue what to do this summer as far as tours and concerts went. Maybe she could ask if they'd allow Ethan to come along, assuming she did another tour.

She was honestly a bit excited to hear his answer. Maybe she would become prefect, then she could write him an owl and tell him all about it when they hung out in Hogsmeade together. The smile on Ethan's face was contagious and Layla found herself smiling back towards him. "I don't know what the requirements are, but I'm not sure I meet them," she said jokingly. For the most part, it was true, but she didn't want Ethan to think she felt bad about it, because she didn't. If she didn't get prefect then it wouldn't be the end of the world.

As the girl ran her fingers over him badge, she felt his arms unwrap from around her which made her a bit sad. However, when his fingers brushed across her face to brush away the tears, she took a deep breath because the feel of his skin on hers was absolutely amazing. She wanted to reach up and keep his hand there on her cheek. She wanted to constantly be able to feel the warm, tingly shock of his energy connecting with hers and she wanted to feel the shivers run down her spine again. When his hand moved to brush the hair off her face, she found her cheeks becoming extremely red as she looked away from him for a second, trying to contain the feelings she felt. However, she was unable to.

"Ethan," the girl swallowed, her heart began to race, "I have something to tell you." The girl turned her body ever so slightly, not enough to not be able to feel the heat coming from him, but enough to be able to reach the piano keys with both arms. Taking a deep breath, she began to play and sing a happy, Muggle song. The song and artist were still fairly new so she wasn't sure if he'd heard of it, but it would put things into perspective as well as explain her feelings without having to actually explain them. She just hoped Ethan understood.

"I don't know but I think I maybe
Fallin' for you dropping so quickly
Maybe I should keep this to myself
Waiting 'til I know you better

I am trying not to tell you
But I want to
I'm scared of what you'll say
So I'm hiding what I'm feeling
But I'm tired of holding this inside my head

I've been spending all my time
Just thinking about you
I don't know what to do
I think I'm fallin' for you"

As she played and sung, the girl's heart slowly began to drum against her chest harder and louder and if she knew that it was impossible, she would almost think that he would be able to hear it, but he couldn't, and she was glad.

The rest of the song, she found, didn't really apply as much, but she played it anyways, refusing to look at him once she had finished. She was nervous, she was afraid, maybe she shouldn't have told him, after all, it may make things awkward or worse, it could end their friendship. There was, however, no better time to tell him than the present.

Layla exhaled and looked to him, feeling a bit sheepish.


*Song is 'Fallin' for You" by Colbie Caillat

Ethan had no real remorse for anything he had done, or probably he will do. He thought for a second, why did she think that no one would like her performance that much? She was great at what she did. "Yes really." He spoke chuckling slightly at her doubts of to what he had told her. Although he knew that it wasn't her fault. Anyone who preforms like that is bound to have their doubts about themselves.

Ethan His smile only grew wider by the second when she returned it. He had calmed her down. "Look at it this way, If I can get one, i'm pretty sure you're going to get one as well." He reassured her, scoffing as he pointed to himself. He had always talked with his hands, and probably look weird if he didn't.

After brushing the strands out of her face, he placed his hands in his lap and grinned at her. When she spoke however, his stomach kind of dropped. Was she going to tell him she was leaving? Was she going to leave him at Hogwarts? Was she moving? it could have been anything. She turned slightly to reach the piano. He focused on her hands. trying to decipher what the lyrics were trying to tell him through the simple muggle song.

As soon as she began he didn't know what to think. He hadn't meant to make her fall for him. She was so young. Surely there was another person out there she would want? He listened to the song and found himself excited. Maybe he could return the feelings? He continued to watch her hands, and frowned. What would the others at Hogwarts say when it went through the rumor mill? He knew he shouldn't worry with things like that and all, but who was one to say they didn't?

He had to stop and think for a second before the song ended. His reaction would affect her, and this was a situation to where he couldn't end it with a joke, to change the topic. She felt the need to tell him this, then he should respect that and give her a response. He didn't want to hurt her, that was for sure. He continued to smile for her though a plan of somewhat forming in his head.

"That was beautiful Layla." He started. He didn't know exactly what to tell the witch but he had to tell her something. "Was that what you were trying to tell me?" he asked as if he was making sure that what he interpreted was correct before making a fool of himself, or worse, make Layla cry once more. He also didn't want to make their friendship awkward because she was one of the few he was comfortable with, and he didn't want to loose that.

Her eyes lit up at his response, at the fact that he was telling the truth. She felt she ought to thank him, for what, she didn't know exactly, but the feeling ceased to subside, even though she refused to thank him. It wasn't that she didn't want to, it was that she didn't want him to ask why she was. The girl gave him a smile like no other, a smile that truly portrayed her happiness, however, it was short lived as the feelings of worry crawled back in.

Once again, at his response to the fact that he was sure she'd earn a Prefect's badge at some point, even without feeling qualified, she smiled. Quite frankly, Ethan was the only one who could make her smile the way he did. When she was with him, her worries seemed to disappear and they seemed to be the only two people left in the world, or at least in her mind.

When his fingers left her hair and rested in his lap, it took everything in her not to reach out for his hand. She didn't want him to stop, she wanted him to continue to caress her hair and her cheek. She wanted his hand in hers and she wanted his arms wrapped around her. At one point, the contact of a boy would've scared her, but now, it was what she wanted. That was when she first realised just how much she'd grown up. The thought of her growing up and admitting to her fascination with boys or this one boy, took her by surprise and she had to rethink her thoughts for a moment. It was something she was not familiar with and she didn't know how to act. Worried Ethan might see the shock she just underwent, she changed her facial expression to something a bit more normal.

As the girl played and sung, thoughts circled through her head. Her biggest concern was Ethan not feeling the same or worse, him laughing at her, but even worse would be her making their friendship awkward. He was her best friend, her only friend and she couldn't bare to lose him. Once again, the girl found herself fighting back tears, tears from the feeling of fear and rejection. However, unlike last time, she was able to hold them in and Ethan would never know.

When she had finished, she was glad that he thought it was beautiful, however, that was not the response she was going for. She tried to search his face for an answer, but she couldn't see a clear emotion. Was he confused? She bit her lip and as he asked a question she nodded her head slowly. "Yes," the voice came out quietly, as a whisper, almost like she was afraid to speak, afraid to be hurt.

Immediately, the girl opened her mouth again, spilling out words before he could even have the chance to respond. "I'm sorry Ethan, I shouldn't have said that, it was stupid of me to think you'd feel the same," she paused, biting her lip once more. "I'm younger and you probably want someone older, better, someone who isn't going to ruin your reputation."

She never had a chance with him.