When you try your best but you don't succeed (Jazalea)

The reservedness of Azalea's boyfriend didn't... surprise Jake. Perhaps a little bit of concern would be more akin to what he was feeling in that moment. Jake had known for a long time whilst he was with Azalea that keeping yourself closed off, omitting information, or... any kind of reserve was not something that had helped the witch. But, that had been many years ago now, and things had definitely changed.

But, Azalea looked to be having one of those moments in which she was struggling.

And it wasn't his place to put holes in a relationship.

"Talk to him about it." Jake urged the witch, though he doubted that she hadn't already tried to do that. Josh would open up with time, or else Azalea's mind would decide upon their own backstory, like it seemed she'd already decided upon.

Jake's worry was removed when the witch spoke of her mother in law, earning a soft chuckle from the Auror as she mocked the words that had been spoken. His head moved sideways to see the woman beside him as she mentioned that her mother in law had to be called 'Lady Eleanor'. "Oh, Merlin, the British are a funny lot. Lady Eleanor? Who does she think she is?" The man laughed, shaking his head amused. "And Josh called his son Josh?" The idea was one that seemed quite weird to Jake, especially as it wasn't followed by 'Jnr', either. But he left it at that, simply amused by the way the British decided upon names for their children.

The man watched quietly as Azalea copied Clara's number across to his phone, taking a moment to appreciate... well... the woman before him. He probably shouldn't, but even after all these years, Azalea was a beautiful woman. Changed in many ways, but still the same in most ways. The easiness of the relationship was only clouding everything now, too, even as they talked of the boyfriend she had a few hundred miles away.

The phone was offered back to him, but Jake didn't move to take it, far too relaxed, and not really requiring the device. He'd been about to tell her just to put it on the sofa when the phone, and the witch's hand touched his thigh. Not inappropriately, but in a reassuring nature as the witch told him he would be fine. Jake wished he could believe those words, but he wasn't sure that he would cope as well as he had in the recent weeks with her help.

"Truth be told, I'm going to miss the kiddos like crazy, I've gotten so used to them being around, it's hard to imagine..."

Jake's free hand came to rest upon Azalea's that rested upon his thigh, giving the hand a small squeeze in reassurance. "You know... you're always welcome to come and see them." Jake told the witch softly, lifting his head back up from the sofa to look at the witch properly. "They'll miss you, too."

As will I.

The space between them seemed to have reduced, though Jake was sure neither one of them had moved from their original spot on the sofa. The smell of the witch's perfume had never been quite so prominent as it was in that moment, confusing the senses more than any alcohol would ever be able to muster.

Somewhere in the back of his mind, the thought registered for a second.

But the intoxicating pull of the moment won out.

Leaning in very slowly, waiting for a sign that he should not do what he'd intended to, Jake's lips came down to Azalea's with the softest of kisses. Just the one, as his heart pounded deeply in his chest, anticipation mounting deep from within.

The moment had felt right.

The kiss had felt right.

And for the life of him, Jake could not remember why he'd waited for this.

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~ Auror ~ Profile ~ DADA Professor ~
~ In a Relationship ~ 36 ~ Father ~ 6' ~ American Accent ~

"Talk to him about it."

I've tried, the witch almost admitted, stopping herself at the last minute so as not to sound disloyal to josh. He really hadn't done anything to deserve her intruding on his past affairs.

Except... It wouldn't be necessary if he just told her. It didn't worry Azalea what she would find if she looked far back enough. Her concern was more for the fact that Josh was either consciously or unconsciously trying to conceal things from her.

No it was much safer to pore over the frivolities of British elites. "Joshua Ethan Murray the Second,' she corrected him with a grin as Jake tried to comprehend the naming of children in the English upper class. "It's apparently a thing. I think his daughter is expected to be named Eleanor the forty fifth or something." Another small peal of laughter escaped the witch before the final sip of wine went down her throat. Her glass soon joined Jake's empty beer bottle on the coffee table in front of them.

It was... fun. Azalea was having fun with Jake and it was so familiar. In fact, if the witch allowed herself to think such things, everything about this scene was familiar. The sofa, the songs too low in the background, the bet bottle and wine glass, Jake's hand o hers, comforting her, telling erh she could see the children whenever she wanted.

It was all like reliving a familiar, comfortable dream she couldn't quiet remember but recalled waking up regretfully from. The contents of the dream were not important, just the feel that something deeply right had been disturbed.

Perhaps Jake felt it too? Perhaps at this one moment in time, they could feel the same things without being conscious of what balances they were upsetting by merely existing contentedly in the same moment? Perhaps... Jake's face was closer to ehr now than it had been in forever.

As much as Azalea would have liked to believe it otherwise, she was hyper aware in the moment leading up to the kiss. The Auror's eyes sought hers first, his intention clear, his excuses ready, giving her ample opportunity to back away. And to her credit, she had tried. She had tried with every iota of her being to move but it had been like the pull of a magnet to its opposite pole, intensified a million times. Almost against her own will, her eyes connected to his.

And it was all over.

It only took a mono second to remember the touch of his lips on hers. It took even less time to realize what had been missing all along.

As his lips molded to hers, Azalea finally understood what it meant to come home.

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When you try your best but you don't succeed (Jazalea) - Page 2 Rsz_gr10

When you try your best but you don't succeed (Jazalea) - Page 2 Rsz_az10

When you try your best but you don't succeed (Jazalea) - Page 2 Rsz_li10

Thought left in favour of action in that moment. The softness of Azalea's lips against his own was like relieving a dream so very old now that it was scarcely even a memory anymore. And yet, despite the memories being so hazy, barely even there, it felt so very familiar as they shared the moment together.

The light sheen that was always upon the witch's lips would be left upon his own lips as Jake broke the kiss. Careful not to move too far away from the witch because he didn't want this to stop. His mind was not yet ready to formulate another thought, nor a plan. Their noses brushed lightly together in that moment as the man followed instinct and the signs he was being given by Azalea.

No movement away from him came, and perhaps even the opposite had happened if he were to be able to think clearly in that moment. All Jake knew was that his lips moved forth to repeat the action once more. Their lips would meet in another kiss, one that would show the intentions of the male clearly enough as it kept from being as brief as the first. This one held, as if trying to remember exactly how the lips of the witch before him felt like, tasted like even.

The hand that covered Azalea's moved enough for his thumb to draw soothing arcs in to the back of her hand, whether for Jake's own sake or the witch's would be anybody's guess in that moment.

No sign came that he should stop...

Jake nipped lightly at the witch's lower lip with the third kiss, taking in the reaction that came with a small smile playing on his lips.

The encouragement was quite clear for the man as his tongue traced the curve of her lower lip, Azalea's lips parting for him as if they'd been longing for him to do that for a while now. He would comply eagerly with the invitation, too, pressing himself closer to the witch as his free hand moved to find a place in her hair...

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~ Auror ~ Profile ~ DADA Professor ~
~ In a Relationship ~ 36 ~ Father ~ 6' ~ American Accent ~

Azalea was drowning once again, in pure sensation as Jake kissed her. Moving away, the farthest thing from her mind as his soft touch fell upon her like water on parched earth. Up until now, the witch hadn't remembered what it felt like to physically miss him, but now she knew.

And she couldn't help thinking they were both worse off for it.

This had to stop, this was wrong. This could never stop, it was the most right thing in the world. There were so many reason why they couldn't do this, and yet one reason why they should and it outweighed everything else. So when his lips moved away, Azalea did not. The witch didn't move, not even a centimeter and soon enough, they were back, this time, more insistent than before.. His thumb soothingly stroked the back of her hand, opening up a floodgate of memories.

Jake and Azalea as teenagers, sitting behind the Devil after she'd finished a midnight shift.

Jake and Azalea in the joint common room, curled up on the sofa studying for an exam.

Jake and Azalea in a hospital room, she refusing to leave his side.

Jake and Azalea in their first apartment, dancing and painting the walls.

Jake and Azalea by the lake, taking Victoria and her friends swimming.

Jake and Azalea at a wedding.

Jake and Azalea drinking

Jake and Azalea.

Only Jake and Azalea.

When his hands reached into her hair, she didn't know, only that she must have moved closer to accommodate the gesture. Or he must have turned sideways. or someone must have turned somewhere because the world was titled and Jake was on his back. Only her own locks falling over their faces through altered gravitational force made the witch realize they were now lying on the sofa.

Or at least Jake was.

As for herself, the brunette was using him as her sofa.

The kisses that had begun soft and spaced out were a distant memory now, Jake panting heavily as their tongues clashed with each other, reacquainting after a lifetime to what this homecoming felt like. Her own fingers had curled somewhere between them, bringing his shirt with them in a manner she would later recall from the Hogwarts yearbook she had found earlier.

Jake on the hand and, had wasted no time encircling her small waist and pulling her tout to his frame, matching their positions for easier access as his tongue probed deeper inside her, as if it longed to explore everything it had missed over the years. The witch let out a small moan as his hold tightened to her waist and then-

BUZZZZZZZZZ

BUZZZ BUZZZZZ

The phone vibrated angrily from the floor where it had been dropped, the picture of the caller flashing ominously on the screen.

As if she'd caught them red handed.

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It was easy.

Getting lost in the kisses was the easiest thing Jake had had to do in a very long time. It had taken only a few moments to reacquaint himself with the feeling of kissing Azalea, another couple to get in to the motions, and then he'd been lost.

Whether it had been him or Azalea who'd pressed them back in to the sofa, the man would never have known. All he knew was that his hand had move from Azalea's to encircle her waist in the transition, ensuring she wouldn't fall off of the sofa as they moved, their legs entangling in the process.

His breathing had quickened, and Jake found himself breathless from the first kiss as his tongue probed deeply in to the witch's mouth. Coming up for air had been only a breath affair before the next, his head feeling lighter than ever before as he brought the witch closer to him, and devoured her lips as if his life depended upon it.

Or, some part of him did.

The errant thought had made the man hold on to the witch more tightly, not wanting this to end, not wanting to think, just feel.

His tongue pressed hers back firmly, reasserting his intentions as a stifled moan left his own lips in almost the same moment a similar sound escaped Azalea. The soft sound only encouraging him to press forward, to get more, to-

BUZZZZZZZZZ

BUZZZ BUZZZZZ

Both of them jumped, as if back in their teenage years and they'd been caught red handed somewhere they were not supposed to be. It took Jake a moment to understand what the noise had been, and upon realising it was only his phone, his lips moved to the witch's throat, placing kisses on the soft skin before moving back towards Azalea's lips, trying to spur her back in to action.

BUZZZZZZZZZ

BUZZZ BUZZZZZ

Azalea's attention was not moving from his phone on the floor, though, and glancing sideways, the man could understand why. There, on his phone screen was the picture of his sister staring back at them. Untangling his fingers from the witch's hair, Jake reached out to the phone, his other arm still around Azalea's waist as he brought the phone up to his ear.

"Hi Vic," Jake answered, almost too chipper as he tried to convey to Azalea that she didn't have to move. "Yeah, I'm alright... yeah, I just finished a workout session. I know it's late, but I had a tough day at work and needed to let off some steam..."

Victoria's voice would likely be heard on the other end of the phone as she started to talk about her reason for ringing. Which, there wasn't one. Just an update from her side of the pond, and a quick catch up with how he was getting on with the children... Each of Jake's answers was short, but with every moment that passed, the air in the room was changing, and it didn't take a fool to realise it.

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~ Auror ~ Profile ~ DADA Professor ~
~ In a Relationship ~ 36 ~ Father ~ 6' ~ American Accent ~

Slowly, begrudgingly, intoxication gave away to reason.

Victoria's flashing smile on the phone screen reminded the witch of the reality she had temporarily forgotten, one which she was still very much responsible for. Even as Jake reached for the phone, his tone almost too casual as he cited a workout while holding on to her in the universal gesture of "this isn't over", Azalea knew it was.

An image of Josh flashed behind her eyelids, looking hurt and disappointed. Wondering what he could have done to warrant such a cruel betrayals.

An image of Ethan's questioning gaze followed, almost more painful than his father's quiet accusations.

This was all her fault. The witch opened her mouth to say sorry, only to realize she couldn't speak or Victoria - her best friend - would know what she had done. She could never tell Victoria.

She couldn't tell anybody how low she had sunk.

Gently tugging herself way from Jake, the witch sat upright, turned away slightly from the man as her slight frame shook underneath the cardigan that had moved askew through their joined actions. Pulling her shirt in place,t he witch waited quietly, the very picture of reserved until Jake had finally completed his call.

"Will do, bye Vic."

A deep sigh left the Auror as his phone was tossed aside, confirmation that whatever had possessed them to... to do that earlier was over.

"It's.. uh... getting late," the brunette motioned to the wall clock without really looking at it. Literal time was the least of her problems right now. "You have to be up early for.... for the kids," she added, getting to her feet. If there had ever been a cue to leave, this was it.

"I'm sorry, I'll get out of your hair."

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Come Plot With Me <3

With each second that passed on the call with Victoria, the reality of the situation came in to being. Jake barely heard a word his sister said, only 'hmm'ing and agreeing in what seemed to be the right moments. It took too long for Victoria to realise she was keeping him, an apology came from his sister as she finalised with a 'Jackson says hi by the way', and then the usual message to look after himself, and give the kids a big squeeze from their Aunt Victoria in the morning.

"Will do, bye Vic!" Jake finalised the call, hitting the end call button a little too hard.

The silence came in a harsh reality. Jake tossed his phone aside with a sigh, ready to say... say something as he righted himself back up. His hands went to move to comfort Azalea, to tell her that things were okay. That... what? Jake didn't know, but before he had time to think of anything, Azalea was motioning to the clock and denoting it was late.

"Azalea..."

"You have to be up early for.... for the kids,"

Her words cut across his own sentence once more -- even if it hadn't been fully formed. The witch was already on her feet, though, and Jake followed suit, trying and failing to think of something to say that could make all of this better. Was he sorry for kissing her? Not really, they'd both... they...

And yet, the man didn't like how he was making the witch act in this moment, and he didn't know what he could possibly do to stop her from feeling like-

"I'm sorry, I'll get out of your hair."

"You don't have to." Jake replied, though whether he meant apologise or getting out of his hair was something that would be left unknown between the two of them. "I... I'm sorry, for putting you in this position. I..."

But his mind had gone blank in that moment.

Unable to determine whether he should move forward and draw Azalea back in to his arms, to comfort her in that moment because they'd both just done something they would never condone. Yet moving forth to the witch seemed inadvisable in that moment, almost as if it would push her further away than the small space that stood between them now.

Which led them both to the same point. Moving in the same moment to collect Azalea's belongings, Jake collecting her bag of school work and following her towards the front door. The energy had shifted to an almost jagged tension as they both turned inwards with their thoughts. The Auror tried in vain to find something that would make all of this okay, to make it not appear as bad as it was. But he didn't find himself wanting to lie, or to tell Azalea that it didn't mean anything.

Because they were both quite aware that something meaningful had happened in that moment.

"Well... I..." Jake started, opening the door for Azalea and then offering her her bag. "Thank you for looking after the children for me again today. And for keeping me company this evening. Please... don't be a stranger, you know you're always welcome here." He settled on, but somewhere, in the back of his mind, Jake was quite sure that he wouldn't be seeing Azalea at his home during the summer.

He'd made sure of that much with his actions that evening.

"Text me... when you get back to Hogwarts safely." Was the only other thing he could think of.

Something he'd never asked Azalea to do before.

And yet, here they were.

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~ Auror ~ Profile ~ DADA Professor ~
~ In a Relationship ~ 36 ~ Father ~ 6' ~ American Accent ~

"Azalea..."

"You have to be up early for.... for the kids,"

She had to cut him off because if she didn't, there was a reasonable chance Azalea would let herself be convinced of whatever excuse he had made up in his head. Whatever he felt justified their actions was wrong. She had to say it because this wasn't just about the two of them.

It was also about the two children sleeping not too fat away, about a little boy fast sleep in Wales and a man who was probably still awake, wondering what she was up to in Scotland.

Where she was most certainly not.

Keeping this arrangement from Josh should have been a warning sign. She had been stupid not to see it for what it was from the beginning. As much as she had wanted to spend time with the children, she had also wanted this to be something that was hers, not something she needed to tell others about, not something she needed permission for.

She had wanted to be around Jake because in a world of strangers, he had always felt like the most familiar shade of sorrow. Whether he'd broken her heart fourteen years ago or she had didn't matter because those broken pieces only ever connected to each other.

"I'm sorry, I'll get out of your hair."

"You don't have to."

But she did, she absolutely did need to. They needed the sanity only afforded by distance to understand what had happened, process where had gone wrong and plan the rest of their lives around it not happening ever again.

"I... I'm sorry, for putting you in this position. I..."

Didn't mean it? her dark brown yes flashed to his, daring him to say the words out loud. Even if he did, she wouldn't have believed it for a second. He had meant everything. And if they weren't careful, both of them would mean it all over again.

Thankfully the man did not deny their tryst as unimportant, instead just following her to the hallway to help collect her things. Her phone, car keys and coat were taken by the witch while her book bag went to Jake, the Auror slinging the heavy satchel easily from one hand to the other as he followed her to her car.

"Thank you for looking after the children for me again today. And for keeping me company this evening. Please... don't be a stranger, you know you're always welcome here."

"I know," she replied with a small smile of her own, purely in reciprocation. "Don't forget to call Clara okay?" she reminded him as they deposited her stuff on the passenger seat. He meant well but they both knew they couldn't see each other again, at least not under the same circumstances as tonight.

Because fourteen years and deep, psychological trauma hadn't dulled her feelings for Jake Newbury.

It had intensified them.

And there was no room for these feelings in the life of today's Azalea, one who was in a happy relationship with a man who most definitely deserved better than her.

"Text me... when you get back to Hogwarts safely."

"I will," she promised as she waved awkwardly at the man before getting into the vehicle. "Take care." Yes, she would text him one last time. And then delete his number from her phone. And go back to avoiding him in the halls like she had done two years ago.

And hopefully things would go back to normal.

And hopefully she would be able to lie to herself long enough to keep her word.

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» Dont look back (OPEN)
» Why Does It Always Rain on Me? (Jazalea)
» Stay A Little Longer (Jazalea)
» Why have a ballroom with no balls? (Jazalea)
» And the day bleeds, into nightfall (Jazalea)