Rehab Part 1 (Lucy & Jake - TW: Substance abuse, torture & depression)

Drugs , Alcohol and spiralling out of control

It seemed that was all Lucy knew once she got out of St Mungos , several very near suicide attempts and substance abuse meant she was put into some fancy panty rehab centre . She needed to be there for her own safety and the safety of others at the moment .

Though she'd only Been on drugs for a month , it took longer to come off them. Her tiny body didn't like the high doses she'd put into herself so withdrawals had been hard . Harder still were the sleepless nights .

Everytime she closed her eyes she was plagued by nightmares , she felt and remembered everything . Every time she thought she could close her eyes she was awake screaming not long after . Lucy had lost weight on her already small figure , what had once been healthy was now on the verge of anorexia . She tried to eat but the nightmares meant she threw it all up most days .

Most days Lucy spent by herself , her favourite place had become the swingset . She spent hours going back and forth , back and forth . Trying so desperately to become in a sense . Normal , again.

Her psychologist and the other services helped , but even once her mind set became more healthy she kept feeling like she had been w failure . The constant twinge of her scar reminded her that she'd not been able to defend herself with even the simplest of escape skills .

Finally , finally Lucy felt alone , and not in a way she liked . She'd kill for a friend . Well maybe not kill, but she would come close . Swallowing her pride , she'd written to Jake with a simple letter .

" Im free Tuesday ...
Lucy ."

She sat on the swing , going back and forth and had her headphones in, listening to some music .

Lucy hadnt heard movement at first as she had been humming while listening to her music , she did hear leaves crunch however ; taking her earphones out she looked up at who was coming and saw Jake sit next to her . She'd been contemplating as to wether or not he would actually come . She had been a right royal see ya next Tuesday type of person to one of her oldest friends .

" hey Jake ." She said softly , watching him sit on the opposite swing . The goody bag looked delicious and she outstretched a hand to get it, one of her tattoos now not as perfect . A large scar down the middle disfigured it . As soon as Lucy realised she'd reached for the bag with it visible she turned her hand down. Ashamed . But carefully took the bag and opened it .  " Thank you ." She told him, kicking her legs under her to swing just a little as she found he had put in her favourite gummy bears , Veg of course .

A few mouthfuls in she paused . Realising she was wolfing them. Rather rudely too, Lucy swallowed and paused . " Sorry... Kinda hungry ." She said with a hint of a smile. She'd always been hungry . More nights then she liked to admit she'd been caught , and not just by Jake sneaking into the kitchen in the middle of the night to make cookies or grab food . And she'd never admit that maybe on more then one occasion a certain teacher might or might not have joined her .

Lucy ate the gummies one at a time , she savoured them incredibly . " Can't keep food down for very long ." She said to Jake quietly, not looking at him because she was ashamed of it . " But the wear off and come downs are almost all gone ."

The fact Jake remained quiet was a blessing to Lucy , she simply said. " It didn't mean anything any more . " the tattoo had represented strength , something she didn't feel she had , or deserved . The way she'd done it wasn't something they needed to go over .

Nodding and having the gummies one at a time she watched Jake , he looked peaceful , but cautious in her opinion . No doubt probably with good reason to after the last time .

His question however made her shake her head " if they know they won't tell me ." Lucy answered , " The drugs are only one stage . I don't want to .. Do it again either ." She told Jake , her hand subconsciously going to the scar . Looking down she finished . " I can't sleep . Every time I try , or I close my eyes the nightmares come back . I wake screaming . If I've had food.. It comes right back shortly after . I'm tired Jake , tired and ashamed ."

She felt like lesser of a witch , she couldn't get sleeping potions yet as she was still coming off her drug cocktails . She wasn't going to risk getting addicted to sleeping tablets or pills or potions . " I'd give anything . Anything to be normal again ."

For both of their best interests Lucy decided not to comment on what he said , as it was a touchy subject at the best of times. " I don't want to be like that again . I never want to be like that again ."

The proposal he gave was a generous one , however Lucy shook her head " You have too much on to offer that , there's school, plus flying , plus being an Auror , let alone your family Jake . You don't need to burden yourself with coming here every week. " she told him, " But I am grateful for the offer but I know you're better use doing your job . Protecting people ."

Lucy shrugged as she was asked about her time " Monday's and Thursday's is group therapy sessions , Wednesday's , Friday's and Sunday's are with the psychologist . Saturday is a lifestyle choice or something I dunno they give us like ted talks before we go to counselling or something like that and get our health evaluated . Tuesday I'm supposed to go to gym but doc says I can't coz I'm not strong enough . Apart from that it's eat at meal times , sometimes there are movies on, otherwise it's just usually me here in the garden or library but all the books are religious or non triggering with no romance or drama or action . Routine Check is at Seven before its lights out at nine ."

Jakes reassurance and asking got a soft nod in return . " Alright ." She said softly , another few gummy bears going down the hatch .

Jake always made time for her , he'd done it at hogwarts and now he was offering to do it again . She was grateful for it , looking at him she offered some gummies " difference between these and normal is they aren't made out of gelatine , it's a plant version that does the same thing ."

Pausing as he spoke , she listened to his idea . Before looking down . Magic hadnt helped her last time . But maybe this time would be different . The strength part was what got her attention . Maybe it could work . At this point she was willing to give it a go. Lucy nodded " Alright , Jake.. I'll give it a go . But I don't have my wand here ." Safety measures . " So unless I suddenly have a ton of non verbal magic it's going to be difficult . I'm not supposed to get the wand back until I leave ."